secratary one liners,,,,,

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secratary one liners,,,,,

Postby member_3625 » Thu Nov 24, 2011 12:00 pm

1. The patient has no previous history of suicide.

2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another Hospital.

3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40pound

weight gain in the past three days.

4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in

bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.

10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69yr old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.

11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. She is numb from her toes down.

13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

14. The skin was moist and dry.

15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

18. She stated she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.

19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for fisical therapy.

20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.

24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

25. Patient has to teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

26. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

27. The patient was in his usual sstate of good health until his airplane ran out

of fuel and crashed.

28. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

29. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions

in early December.

30. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was feeling

better.



:D ave a gud un,,Bri,
member_3625
 
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